The Dark Road Not taken
by No Fate 1990
Summary: This story was inspired by Avengers: Endgame. In this story, Steve Rogers aka Captain America contemplates lost love, old age, and his fate.
1. The Dark Road Not Taken

The dark road not taken,

all that you have forsaken

for the greater good. Although

you were very young and strong,

you were broken inside. You took

a gigantic leap of faith even it meant

that you would jump to your death.

Your abrupt sudden departure shook

me to the core. I was in such deep shock

over your untimely passing. That bloody tide,

death should've carried me away with you.

Now that you are gone, I wonder if I am the

next one to go? The dark road not taken,

my own personal sacrifice.


	2. His and Her Dying Hope and Sunrise

Natasha's p.o.v (as an angel)

Running out of time

Echoes of what could've been

A huge real page turner

Crawling on two legs

More than just a terrible miscarriage of justice

His and her dying hope and sunrise

A baby angel that they will never know


	3. JR

Time Period: A Flashback

Natasha's pov

I checked the calender and realized that my period was late. I felt sick to my stomach. I assumed I

was pregnant, but I didn't mention anything to Steve. Although Steve was busy, he made time for

me. He took me the hospital where a doctor confirmed my pregnancy. The news shocked us and

yet delighted us.

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback

Situation: A miscarriage

Natasha's p.o.v

It was Steve's idea that we had a party on his yacht. We were planning to tell our friends about our

new baby. I was eight weeks pregnant at the time. I was not in my right mind. I was not in the safe

zone. The fear of miscarriage weighed heavy on my conscience. I took a leap of faith for Steve's

sake. I hoped and believed nothing bad would happen to the baby or me during the party. The

intense heat and the guests' numerous requests became too much for me. Later on I found out

from Steve that I fainted. An ambulance transported me to the hospital where I miscarried our

precious baby girl named Judith Liberty Rogers.


	4. The Girl With A Purple Heart

Natasha's p.o.v

She visits me in the abyss. Even in my dying state, I can identify her. She is my reflection or a mere

figament of my imagination.

* * *

Steve's p.o.v (as an old man)

We are best friends. I am like a second grandfather to her. She enjoys listening to my war stories.


	5. To Be Young, A Ghost, or A Father Again

Steve's p.o.v

Judith and I hear loud voices coming from within the house. "We shouldn't tell him the truth" Bucky

advises the others. "Definitely" the others agree with him. "Please tell me the truth" I demand.

"Judith is more than just Tony's neice. She is your daughter" Bucky reveals. My mind flashes back

to the time when Natasha had a miscarriage. I supressed it so much that I forgot the miscarriage

happened. I didn't want to be in pain anymore.


	6. Our Revisited Painful Tragic History

Steve's p.o.v

Coming back to haunt me and taunt me again

Our revisited painful tragic history

Coming back to haunt me and taunt me again

One open door leading straight down to the abyss

A different kind of black magic

These tears of mine

Even now they are becoming a memory

A sad story worth retelling or forgetting

My great love and loss


	7. My Bleeding Heart Cries Out For You

Judith's p.o.v

You fought your hardest.

You did your best no matter

what. What I couldn't digest

was how the world treated you

wrong. My bleeding heart cries

out for you.


	8. She Has Left Apart of Herself With Me

Steve's p.o.v

She was an angel gone way too soon.

Even now she has left apart of herself

with me. I will always love and cherish

this gift of new life, our precious child.


	9. Reclaiming My Dignity, Youth, & Liberty

Date: 7-4-2019

Event: The Avengers' Annual Independence Day Party

Judith's p.o.v

I am captivated by the numerous pretty fireworks. "Your mom would've loved this firework show" a

familiar male voice comments. I turn around and notice a handsome young man smiling. I get lost

in his pretty blue eyes. He wraps his arms around my waist. "Judith, its me your dad. I am young

again. I reversed time for you" he reveals to me.


	10. Captain Liberty

Steve's p.o.v

"I am sorry for frightening you" I apologize. "You are very handsome. I am intimated but not

frightened by you" Judith denies. "I reversed time because I wanted to train you" I explain. Suddenly

and abruptly, a firecracker strikes Judith.


	11. I am Losing Her, But I Can't Let Her Go

Steve's p.o.v

I carry her away to a safe warm place.

I am losing her, but I can't let her go.

Patiently, I wait for her to wake up.


	12. Disappearing & Descending Into Oblivion

Situation: Judith's Rebirth as Captain Liberty

Judith's p.o.v

Waking up to a new dawn, a new different reality,

I have been reborn. Disappearing and descending into

oblivion, my other past life. I long for liberty.


	13. Miss America and The Golden Scepter

Time Period: A Dream

Place: A Beach

Judith's p.o.v

I can see and hear Dad talking to a redheaded woman. This woman is wearing a pretty tiara and dress. I assume she is a beauty queen, perhaps Miss America. She places a golden scepter in my hands. "Hello again, my beautiful daughter" she acknowledges me.


	14. We're in too deep, But I Love Her Anyway

Steve's p.o.v

She walks in a circle around me and

vice versa. Going back and forth between

the past and our present reality,

it is a neverending cycle. We're

in too deep, but I love her anyway.

Even in her prime, she remains

quite a marvel and my precious

miracle time after time.


	15. Drowning In Your Love

Judith's p.o.v

Drowning in your love, I long for a new beginning.

I am searching for truth and enlightenment.

I am searching for something that is permanent

instead of temporary.


	16. Mine & Her Lasting Living Enduring Hope

Time Period: A Flashback

Situation: The miscarriage

Place: The Hospital

Steve's p.o.v

Somber, I enter Natasha's recovery room. I sit down at her bedside and take her hand in mine. She wonders why I am so sad. She has no idea that she experienced a miscarriage. "We lost the baby" my voice cracks with emotion. The loss doesn't hit her hard until she undergoes an emergency d&c.


	17. Trying To Turn Back The Hands of Time

Steve's p.o.v

Trying to turn back the sands of time,

we are in the prime of our lives.

We hold hands and exhange sweet precious

memories. We burn and bleed out quickly.


	18. Becoming Something Beautiful

Steve's p.o.v

Heaven only knows how empty and lonely you feel inside.

I try my best to teach you and show you the right way to

handle issues. Heaven only knows when you will reach your

breaking point. Please take a moment to just breathe.

Becoming something beautiful and unforgettable,

you completely blow me away.


	19. Walking With Her Who Made & Carried Me

Place: A Cemetery-Agent Peggy Carter's gravesite

Judith's p.o.v

Dad is obvious emotional about something. "This gravesite belongs to a dear friend of mine.

Her name was Agent Peggy Carter. Today marks the anniversary of her death" Dad shares with me.


	20. Parallel Past Present Lives

Judith's p.o.v

Sacred blood ties

Parallel past present lives

A tale of two star-crossed lovers

My unfolding lifestory


	21. James: The Other Romanoff Rogers Child

Time Period: A Flashback-An Alternate Universe

Situation: Judith's older brother (James) is dying from Leukemia

James' p.o.v (as a child)

"James' cancer is incurable. His condition is getting worse. It is a matter of time" Mr. Stark informs

my family. My family prepares to tell me goodbye. I fight with myself to stay awake and alive for

them.


	22. Maybe I Was Born To Suffer & Die Along

James' p.o.v continued

Barely scratching the surface

Love that is full of mercy and grace

A bittersweet swansong

Maybe I was born to suffer and die along

Even now my life is not over yet


	23. He Sees Beyond My Plans For Him and Us

Natasha's p.o.v

He prefers and chooses the dark road not taken.

He plays in a burning ring of fire. He is underattack

by cancer, but I still desire more for him.

He sees beyond my plans for him

and us.


	24. Leaning and resting on my shoulder

Steve's p.o.v

Leaning and resting on my shoulder,

you are surely fragile. You smile in your

sleep. You keep me in your heart for

a while. Leaning and resting on my

shoulder, you consider me to be

your rock. We can't go back to the

good old days when

living forever was a

possibility.


	25. The Dark Phantom: Captain Justice

Steve's p.o.v

Time is not James' friend even in his prime. I struggle to accept this fact: he entered and will exit this world prematurely. He is transitioning over to a world where I don't belong. Natasha and Judith are simply dumbfounded. "I am leaving, but I don't want to go" he hesitates waving his golden staff. "There is no cancer or suffering in paradise" I comfort him.


	26. A Justified Premature Baby Love of Mine

Time Period: A Flashback

Place: A hospital room

Event: James' premature birth (occurring when Natasha is seven months pregnant)

Natasha's p.o.v

Last month, I was hospitalized for experiencing premature labor. I was six months pregnant back then. The doctor was able to stop my labor and discharge me quickly. Steve kept a close eye on me though. My husband tended to my every need at home. He loved and cherished me very much. Our hope and faith overshadowed our unborn son's grim dark future. We chose life instead of death for James even when dealing with a difficult pregnancy.

Who knew my water would break for good the following month? My premature labor hasn't been a false alarm this time around. The doctor can't stop my labor because I am already fully dilated. My discomfort and the intensity of my contractions signal James' impending arrival. During the pushing stage, his heartbeat starts dropping. The doctor uses extra force to get him out asap. My constant loud sobs and screams don't bother Steve. Steve squeezes my hand and coaches me through the pain. I feel sore but much better after I deliver our precious miracle baby. The NICU becomes James' new second temporary home. Steve and I check on our son daily.


	27. You Lied When You Said He Wouldn't Die

Time Period: The Present Reality

Event: James' death

Natasha's p.o.v

James' heart stopped and my soul went up with his into the clouds. Emotionally and mentally

unstable, Istaggered out into the hallway. "Inhale and exhale" Steve instructed me. "James lost his

battle against cancer. You lied when you said he wouldn't die" I snapped at my husband.


	28. Lingering As if You Don't Have A Choice

Steve's p.o.v

Lingering as if you don't have a choice,

your voice is barely beyond the white

noise. Our breakdown in communication

doesn't make any sense at all.


	29. Oceans of Grief and Memories

Natasha's p.o.v

A gigantic hole in my soul

My oceans of grief and memories

Burying me six feet under

Endless and senseless slaughter

Reminders of your brief existence


	30. Rolling Deep in Dirt and Despair

Steve's p.o.v

Rolling deep in dirt and despair

You can barely breathe in fresh air

Always and forever, I am here for you

Now and again, you venture out on your own


	31. Dancing Around An Uncertain Future

Judith's p.o.v

Dancing around an uncertain future

I don't know what to believe anymore

A definite absolute

Nirvana

Nevermind me please

Even if I can measure up to you

X marks the spot where you outshined me

Things will get better for me or maybe not


	32. Sliding, Fading, or Simply Slipping Away

Natasha's p.o.v

Sliding, fading, or simply slipping away from view,

you know this feeling all too well. Disappearing

into the night, your last few words should've

been your last.


	33. Your Bleeding and Crying Stars & Stripes

Judith's p.o.v

The dark road not taken

A broken happy home

Your bleeding and crying stars and stripes

Love's wooden cross

Our bittersweet memories

Running in circles around me


	34. I Was Prepared For It But I Wasn't Ready

Steve's p.o.v

He was knocking on heaven's door.

I was prepared for it but I wasn't ready

to let him go. Now I am longing for

a remedy for my broken heart.


	35. Lingering Heavy Silence & Slippery Ice

Natasha's p.o.v

Such a bittersweet beautiful tragedy

The dark road not taken

An unjustified bloody cost for redemption

Lingering heavy silence and slippery ice

Looking for and longing for an easy and quick exit strategy

I am wide awake


	36. Leaving Eden, Godspeed Freewill

Steve's p.o.v

Leaving Eden, Godspeed freewill.

When it rains heavily, who will carry

you home to your sanctuary? Legendary

hero with great skill, the thrill is now gone.

Still quiet invincible footsteps kill and bury

dreams that you will never see come true.

Awaken to the darkness and light, your

outlook on life is bittersweet in this beautiful

broken world. A dying sunset, your passion

burns out just like a candle flame. Every

life changing decision that you make

prepares you for another chess game.

This chess game known as life prepares

you for the real world and a possible reunion

with me. We can heal one another, come on,

let us stay together and be best friends forever.

Broken open from the inside out, I worry about

you a lot and feel sorry for you. Heading out of

town, you live by your own rules and don't

dwell in your right mind very often. You do

have the right to life and freedom in God's

country of poetry. You do have a voice, you

do have a choice. Your heart bleeds crimson

in a garden of roses and yet you try to dry

away your tears. After all these years, you

remain my constant companion and I feed

your hungry soul encouragement. Safe in

better hands, you believe in a much more

greater higher power by which is God is love.

You know the difference between your real friends

and your enemies. Longing to create new memories,

you forget about your enemies and losses. Holding

onto impossible plans, every wish is an airplane flying

high above you in the night sky. I wonder what does

it feel like to walk in your shoes and see the world through

your eyes. As fragile as your smile, life is too short for me

to judge you so I cherish your courageous spirit. I pray

you may find your way back home again someday.


End file.
